Breathe.

Nobody expresses openly that they don’t like you, but you can tell by their actions, words and general demeanor….sometimes back, I was so concerned why someone didn’t like me, the person rarely gives nice compliments, instead will say one thing or another, quietly utter hurtful remarks then back it up with laughter. It’s meant to be hilarious but it’s always depressing. Since I actually like this person, I would always strive to think positively and give the benefit of doubts. And for someone like me that can feel almost everything, it was hard not to think about it. I would think and overthink: Did I do anything wrong? Did I offend the person? What can I do to make this person like me? Should I have a conversation with the person?…….alot and alot of questions.

And sometimes, we are influenced by our environment. Later, I realized that I had started to act in a similar manner, like wanting to match negative energy because I want the person to know what it feels like, holding back graceful compliments, occasionally trying to avoid the person to protect my joy and peace….etc. However, I knew that was not me, I don’t want to be that person. I want to be a better person, I was raised in love and I want to genuinely show love. I want to extend grace to others as I have enjoyed such grace from God and other people, I want to practice what my bible says. I am light and I want to carry that light. I want to cheer people up by complimenting them nicely. I want to correct them with love. 

One important realization was that I had to acknowledge God’s love for me. Of course I know that God loves me but as humans, sometimes we lose sight of this and come to rely on the love of others. The Holy Spirit began to remind me of God’s unwavering love for me, even though I did nothing to earn it. He sent His only son, Jesus Christ to die in my place, God’s love is enough. Then I began to reflect on the love and kindness I had also gotten from people; I didn’t have to win anyone over or do anything at all to deserve such love. Now I know better; To guard my heart and focus on the right things. 

If this resonates with you, it’s possible that you are sad because someone or people don’t love you enough or don’t return the favour. So in an attempt to win them over, you try to please them or you are starting to feel resentment towards them forgetting how excited you were about them. Let me start by sending you hugs. 

Breathe! Take a moment to reflect on how much Abba loves you. I’m here to reassure you that you’re loved! 

The mind is vast and I know you might have been overthinking. Give up worrying about people who don’t like you. Stop thinking you did anything wrong because sometimes there is no reason; it is not about you and stop having the urge to change in order to be accepted. Even though I know it can be hurting, I want you to keep in mind that those people are also people, just like you. It’s likely you have hurt others as well but let’s act like I didn’t just tell you that. 😊

Also, don’t be like people who treated you bad; instead, focus on the right things and strive to improve yourself. Remember how awful it was for you, don’t do the same to someone else. Regardless of your background, don’t be the reason someone is depressed. 

There is always something to learn even from bad experiences. For me, I have learnt to appreciate God, myself and the people that love me genuinely. I pray we have the grace to love Jesus more so we would love others better. 

“Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.” ‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4:8‬ ‭NKJV